Dear Fannie Mae
and the rest of you who took our home,
Our house isn’t just and the address it sits upon at 234 E. Heather Ave Gilbert, AZ
85234, its more than that ya see, The story of OUR precious home starts with two people, Newlyweds, with the “American Dream” in their hearts as they search for that “just the right home” to spend the rest of their lives. They looked and looked and were quite picky I may add, they wanted not just a house to call their own but a place to raise a family someday. After looking at all those homes for months on end, they decided upon a little brick house built in 1980 in the “older section” of Gilbert, AZ. The Hubby was originally from Kansas and Missouri and raised in Iola, Ks
to be exact, ahhh but the “wifey” was a proud born and raised Arizona native. She had always wanted to live in Gilbert, when she was younger Gilbert was the Affluent town and full of country living with friendly people that would wave to ya as you drove thru downtown. One of the only places in “modern” city life Arizona that still has only a couple of street lights and a “15-25” mph speed limit, strictly enforced she may add. When they found this home and this quite, friendly, seeming neighborhood, she beamed with excitement and wouldn’t stop bugging her newly married Husband that “This is the one”. They moved in officially in early February 1998 to start their new life together. Not many months after the right thing to do was get a dog to make them a family and she answered an ad in the paper of a little Shepard husky that had be found on the US
60 wandering around and was only a baby. Just 1-2 years old. OMG!! How sad she thought. So when she spoke to hubby he said” NO LONG HAIRED DOGS” and that was the important thing period to him. Well she hopped in her truck with her friend in tow and hit the pet store to stock up on treats and all the basic needs of the new four legged friend to have to welcome it to its new home. She didn’t know if it was a boy or girl just yet. When she arrived to see the dog, She was told they named her Missy, Missy White Paws due to the tips of her toes. She was locked in a crate and hiding, yet when the wife bent down and opened the crate “Missy” “army crawled” out to her and instantly showed that “once again….”This is the one”. OOPS a long hair she was, but wifey didn’t care, when fate happens you have to go with it. So home they went. Hubby wasn’t happy at first and Missy was more than a handful let me tell you, obviously due to the bad hand she was dealt the year before this family got her and they love she now knew, she couldn’t stand when “he people” we away and made the neighbors behind them annoyed not to mention several occasions decided to eat house and home, no joke. To the point, one day wifey came home and Missy had ate the arm off the brand new couch, she scooped Missy up and ran away to her Best Friend Charity’s house to hide, until Hubby promised not to hurt her or get rid of her. The promise he made and kept and after getting Missy on Meds, all was well in our new home. She became the first child and spoiled just like one would be. A few years later it was time to start a “human” family and in April 2000, a little girl was born. No only was Missy the glue that held together a new family, this little miracle was even more so. See that couple tried for two years to make this little girl and just when they thought they were to be “pet parents only” forever, God answered their prayers. So as this beauty grew, she not only did all of her firsts in this home, but across the street at the neighbors, Whom they refer to as “Papa D and Gramma P” is where she took her first steps in his driveway, I mean actual walking steps. She took her first swim in the pool in the backyard, she went potty for the first time like a big girl in HER bathroom in the hall. She has pictures and videos of all of her firsts in THAT house as well as many of her cousins and family members. This house was also known in the neighborhood, as the home for wayward children and people. Anytime, anyone needed a place to hang their head in tough times, THIS IS THE HOUSE
it happened. This is the home we lived when I (wifey) donated my kidney across the US in Florida to a perfect stranger in the middle of our court battle, fighting to save our home from being taken from us. This was the house where the door was always open to a friend in need. Our home is and was to us a warm bed that you can’t get out of in the morning, a tiny pink toothbrush in the bathroom, and the sound of my husband’s key in the door at the end of the day, the familiar sound of the jeep or motorcycle that the dogs new so well. The final resting place of our Beloved Missy, who loved to steal the vine ripen and only RED tomatoes off the plants in the backyard, so she was laid to rest in that very garden she loved so much, 11 years after she became our very first child. The place where right next to her is one of our “wayward children” little gizmo a Chiquaqua I found at a circle k on my way home from work, that the clerk actually kicked across the parking lot out the front door, all because it was over 115 outside and he just wanted to cool off. We need, want and miss our home, a place where we once thought of the word home as where we had grown up, yet we learned its where our family did. Houses get bought and sold; a home stays with you always. Comfort. Security. Favorite family memories. A place for sleepovers. A place of refuge a place all yours. This was something as a child I never had. I (the wifey) had moved well over twenty plus places, I could point em all out across the valley. My hubby on the other hand had three. This home was the first stability I ever had and now its gone and I will not stop fighting for it as this new life we are now living of uncertainty is not the life I wish upon ANYONE! The loss of our home was, is and remains devastating to say the least. Not only do I cry, my little girl and hubby cries, our friends cry for and with us and even our dogs we have now, one Missy’s old friend, Gramma Sam and the others born their in the very rooms between those cement and stucco walls cry in their own way. They too don’t understand why were not there. See,
Our Fraud, deception, criminal activity actually goes back to the day we bought this, our first home, way back in 1997 and it is now all so obvious its makes me cry a lot. Yet I get back up and fight. I have sent letters to President Obama, Senator John McCain
, Senator Russell
, Senator Kyle, The Office of Thrift and Supervision, FTC, HUD, Fannie Mae, Aurora Loan Services, Mayor of Gilbert, AZ, News Station, Gov. Jan Brewer
of AZ, The Arizona Attorney General
Office, YOU NAME IT, EVERYONE Knows my name I bet ;0) . I have sent one there. Go ahead Google my name you will be in for a treat. I am known like a thorn in everyone involved sides as the prickliest of thorns, I was literally finally told, that when I call the screen flashes and they are told not to talk to me. YES SERIOUSLY….. All the way up the latter’s of Fannie Mae, Lehman Brothers
, etc.…. think big,,,, I been there, called there, wrote there ..SOMETHING there…I have filed all appropriate documents including a complaint to the Office of Thrift and Supervision, Congress, FBI, I wrote the Oversight Committee and got a nice response actually, you get the idea Sir/Ma’am. All of which my complaints have never been answered with the exception of Sen. John McCain and The Arizona Ag’s Office, as well as the Mayor Of my hometown of Gilbert, Mayor Lewis. Or if they are it’s a I cant help, or when they do,, ALS responds and even though the answers are plain, bold face lies that I already sent the supporting documents to the requester of help I had seeked, they seem to allow it to continue, send me what they received and say “Well see we helped… vote for us next election or, Hey we sent a letter what do ya want sorry, etc. etc.” Its ok .. Again I am use to it. Yet I WILL NOT GIVE UP!! We go to our courts and our government for help in matters such as when the laws are meant to hold banks accountable for their fraudulent and illegal activity. In Arizona it seems some of our Maricopa County Superior Court Judges are seemingly, more interested in punishing those who didn’t break any laws, namely homeowners, instead of punishing the banks who blatantly break the laws, create fraudulent documents, try to illegally foreclose, and then lie about it. Including that “You don’t get a lawyer your going to loose” as we were told at our last hearing, yet the previous hearing he praised our good faith and hindered the Defendants Council on their breach of contract and bad practices etc. So needless to say we were stumped. There is a quote my mom and others piece by piece instilled in me that I always turn to when I am about to loose it, and that is “See the light that exists inside you and freely, willingly shine that light on the world. You never know the impact you can make on another persons life. You may never know if you made a difference yet keep shining anyway. Sometimes the best rewards are no rewards at all…and the very fact that One person can change the course of history. Yet always remember thru it all, its always YOU, that is that ONE person first and foremost!” I know that Everybody in this life has their challenges and difficulties. That is part of our mortal test. The reason for some of these trials cannot be readily understood except on the basis of faith and hope because there is often a larger purpose which we do not always understand. Peace comes through hope. Were suppose to see each other through the best of times and the worst of times, and this is our worst of times. We want our home, we never wanted to leave it, nor did we EVER ONCE say we would not pay for it. We had been there well over a decade and always paid 1 to 4 hundred more each month on principal the entire time, until the economy tanked and we needed help and then the nightmare for the last three years ensued and YOU NOR ANY OF THE BANKS INVOLVED would help, all it boiled down to was to take our home and we were just plain old deadbeats whom wanted a free house.We just want our house and help with payments we can handle until the job market returns, that’s all we ever wanted and the fact of our title being correct and fair and legal so someday IF we did sell, it wouldn’t be clouded. That’s all we have ever wanted, if anyone even cares.
The Misenhelter Family Of Arizona
FOLLOW UP LETTER FEW WEEKS LATER………………..
I see a couple of you may have indeed “cared” enough to actually “read” my previous letter below this one, but no one of course responded, so you most likely hit read, then delete. Well, as you see, I will not give up. We will not give up. We will keep fighting in every way we can to have our home, The sad reality is if you or ANY OF THE MANY “servicers” would have ACTUALLY helped us when we asked 7-8 months PRIOR to even going late, and then get told “ we cant help you until your 3 months late” and we struggle but don’t go late until WE HAD NOT CHOICE and then fight tooth and nail for well over a year, documents emailed, faxed, mailed, sent and resent, and call after call , after email after email, to EVERYONE and no help, always something, no, we didn’t get, or we got it, or we got some, send more or , one that really floored me, “we received your request to cancel your trial and approved” WHAT???? um what trial as at that point we had not gotten one and HECK NO WAY would we have cancel it. Then finally years or more later, after researching hamp, and deciding to take it to court, in that one phone call, oh ok we can help you, your trial is 654 something and starts the following month and we will mail you the docs. SIGHHHHH….. Well we pay it, call, email, ask, where’s the paper work, month after month, and nothing, nada, nope!, no help, not ONE of your Guidelines, Fannie Mae, well cant say that, but not one of the “help borrower stay in home” guidelines were ever followed, nor the HAMP, no matter WHAT, lies they give you. Hell, I even at one point, trying to get help, had one of your employees, LITERALLY Laugh at me, yes laugh laugh away, I was shocked. Were NOT nor ever were, DEAD Beats, nor want, nor wanted, a FREE house… NOT EVER, but when no one, NO ONE, would help us, that’s when I went from knowing nothing about loans, real estate etc. to knowing way more than I ever wanted to and picked our whole chain of title and every inch of the process apart, millimeter by millimeter and found the ensuing nightmare, I have lived and breathed for almost years. Thanks for that. If you have bothered to look and notice, we never involved you in our lawsuit in the beginning not until almost a year later, Why, cause you WERE NOT foreclosing on us, Nor was IBM LBPS since they were the newly transferred servicer and we called them almost daily and that’s what they kept saying, yet weeks after receiving the Notice of transfer we got a NOTS, WHAT??? Heck Aurora even kept saying IN COURT ON RECORD, that they are not suppose to be there, they are not the party in interest, they no longer have the loan or stake IN it, yet, they continued, as they knew, eventually the legal system would spit this PRO SE fighting family out on its ass. They just thought it would be sooner than later and 5 judges later, we got just that and when the appeal came, the money drained and the attorney I finally was able to get, walked. BUT I AINT DONE. I am still fighting and I have others I didn’t sue to take to court and continue this. Only this time I have more knowledge than ever before and know what to write and what to say and how to fight to get one of the courts to listen.
See, when ALS gave us that trial mod, on the phone that day, they gave it to ME, Rebecca….. wife of Scott the “Borrower who’s sole and separate property,” and wife REBECCA was and has been, “Disclaimed” via 2 disclaimer Deeds” from any rights to it, other than fighting for it with my family, in our community property state, regardless of disclaimer. So that in itself was wrong. Yet as that shows, WE WANTED OUR HOME and ARE and WERE willing to pay for it and stated several, several times in court and to everyone and ON RECORD, we don’t want a free house, we want to pay, why cant someone who actually owns our loan speak up and let us do that trial payment of less than 700 a month until we could have gotten on our feet??!! HELLO, half way thru the damn nightmare of the court proceedings, I was paying you 760 a month rental value and a lawyer 1500 a month, DON’T YA THINK I COULD HAVE PAID YOU A DAMN MORTGAGE????!!! …..If you only would have helped!! WE/I wont…. WON’T give up on our home.Its more than that as you know if you indeed read the last letter below!!! WHY ON EARTH would you want a home to sit when all this time it could have been paid for and by the people whom had been there 14 years and planned on dying and growing old as hell there?? WHY???? Ya know here is again the VERY BRIEF, story of our nightmare, you and the others have put upon us and just SOME of what is wrong in our chain of title, I am still working on the writing it all out bit by bit part, I am now on page 42 (no I didn’t send this all to you here) and I am going thru every notice, announcement, servicing guide, psa, supplement, prospectus, you name it, tila, respa, state and federal law, sentence by sentence, word by word and listing every tiniest item I find wrong to make it perfectly clear to everyone what “our problem” is, and continue mailing it everywhere on earth. Someday, someone will understand and care and help us and know this is not revenge or a vendetta its, moral, its law, its right, its honest, its fair. I have made it my mission that everyone knows our name, our home, our address, our plight. When someone cares and helps I will be thru, YET, I will not stop fighting for what I believe in, as a individual you should understand that. So here ya go again… the SMALL story…..which has been sent to you before, many times with the exception of the bold added info……….
I spent my life, every free minute, researching, learning, studying… doing the whole…. Lets learn all an attorney learns the best we can without a profession or the bar can attitude tucked in my belt. We filed suit against our PREVIOUS loan servicer, yes you read that correctly, PREVIOUS …. Aurora Loan Services, MERS, and Cal Western Reconveyance. Since we had no choice after they transferred our servicing to IBM Lender Business Process Services, as well as Fannie Mae. They ALS transferred servicing effective as of Aug 01,2010 then pursued Foreclosure JULY 22, 2010 anyway. Our suit claimed that the Defendants lack standing to foreclose for a multitude of reasons, including bogus and fraudulent assignments with forged signatures, (with numerous recorded copies of different signatures of the same signer, only photo copies of Promissory Notes (three to be exact I have obtained by them unwittingly I am sure, (one with hand writing, one without), a note that had been illegally securitized, possible 19 and many more so far times that I have uncovered and an inability to produce a copy of the original Promissory Note. You can research our Case at Maricopa County Superior Court SE, CV2010-099383. Feel free, I am not and have not and will not be scared, quiet or hide anything. For one that’s not who I am as a person and for two I stand up for myself and people when wronged in illegal and immoral ways. As I said this will be a “SHORT version” I promise you it is. EVEN THOUGH YOU HAVE OFFICIALLY STOLEN OUR HOME NOW. For these reasons and others beyond our control , we had stopped paying our mortgage approx. 9 months prior, with a now major concern that without proper proof of who owns our note, who is the holder in due course, that now, even trying to get help to no avail, something must be terribly wrong, especially when we had never been behind before and even paid between 100 and 400 more every month we could throughout the loan, on a regular basis, towards our principal that we just could be paying the wrong party, not to mention that the chain of title on our home had officially been clouded as a result of the fact that we now know our loan had been securitized possibly several times over and a multitude of other issues involved and documented, to many to fathom really. Seriously. If you look at our credit report it even looks as if we were somehow, someway, paying THREE mortgage companies at one time during a period. We want our home, we never wanted to leave it, nor did we EVER ONCE say we would not pay for it. Now we are in my old bosses house that he was “paying the mortgage until it short sales, and the 920 will help me an I can help you, its beneficial for both of us”, WELL, that was utter BS and we have only paid into his pockets as he hasn’t paid his mortgage since June 2012 and we moved in Sept 2012. Then, Yup that dreaded letter, in the mail box, Notice of Trustee sale. Yup …. 7th of Feb this“temporary” house went to auction and yup YOU OWN IT Fannie Mae… figures….. and we have no where or way to go anywhere…..especially thanks to the years of hell we went thru, continue to daily go thru, hourly, minute by agonizing minute, the worst when my daughter cries her eyes out.And we have lost everything because of it and it seems as you see to be continuing. We shall make it though, somehow we always do, …ughhh….even if we may be homeless and that’s not a joke. It just all sucks. So it too was “reverted to lender” ha-ha Fannie Mae…. and yup u guessed it I researched this house too and here again YES…this house has a chain of title like ours, it’s a never ending nightmare that we just cant wake from or get the hell out of ! I am still fighting for our own home thru everything in my/our path, even though we had to walk away from our appeal before it even started really, I am trying to find as much info as I can to try again in court on my own some how. I only have unemployment as I was laid off 4 days before my birthday and a week before Christmas. I am always the giver, and rarely take and NEVER ask, but now comes the time I have to swallow my pride for my family and myself. If you cant or choose not to help us I understand and I truly thank you anyway, I am only asking for whatever you are willing to give, like maybe our home and some form of stability once again, I wish we could get our home back, now you are trying to sell it too, ( 234 E. Heather Ave gilbert AZ 85234) is the address just GOOGLE IT or MY NAME and you’ll see I’m a fighter for what’s right,….and there is a small story of my family written in 2011 here…. if Ya want to “meet” us a little and see we are good, normal like you, average, everyday, folks, go to
http://www.gogilbert.com click the link to past issues and hit January 2011 and page 66-67 and meet myself and my family in those pages.
THE TIMELINE OF BROKEN LINKS IN OUR FRAUDULENT CHAIN OF TITLE
1. Mr. M. D. signed a Warranty Deed for the sale of the property on 01/28/1999 and it was recordered in the Maricopa County Recorders Office on, 01/29/199 @ 4:50:00pm. The document number for this is 199900093580.
2. On the same date, Rebecca M signed a “Disclaimer Deed”(D-Deed), ( a deed in which a spouse disclaims any interest in the real property acquired by the other spouse. A mortgage company often asks a borrower to sign a disclaimer deed so that his spouse not having her name on the loan, cannot claim any interest in the property.) The document number for this “D-Deed” is 1999093581. She signed it on 01/28/1999 and it was recorded in the Maricopa County Recorders Office on 01/29/1999 at 4:50:00pm.
3. a Deed of Trust (DOT) was signed on 01/28/1999 by Scott M and recorded in the Maricopa County Recorders Office on 01/29/1999 @ 4:50:00pm with the document number listed as 19990093582
“Trustor”, SECURITY TITLE “Trustee”, Scott M
The “Beneficiary and Lender” STRATFORD MORTGAGE COMPANY
4. An Assignment of Beneficial Interest was signed by PAUL INTERRANTE (Vice President) of Stratford Mortgage Company on 03/01/1999, yet wasn’t recorded in Maricopa County Records until 06/07/1999 at 9:37:00am. Document number 19990543999 (It should also be noted that the address listed as that of the assignee which is named PRINCIPAL RESIDENTIAL MORTGAGE, INC. is the same as what was listed as the address for STRATFORD MORTGAGE COMPANY in the DOT. Yet Stratford Mortgage is located in Quinlin, TX.)
“Trustor” Scott M “Trustee” SECURITY TITLE
“Assignor and Beneficiary” as STRATFORD MORTGAGE COMPANY
“Assignee” as PRINCIPAL RESIDENTIAL MORTGAGE INC.
5. 2006 Refi Docs- Rebecca M again on March 21, 2006 signed a “Disclaimer Deed” document number 20060394389 & was recorded in Maricopa County Recorders Office on 03/26/2006 @ 3:19:03pm.
6. On 03/23/06 a “ Deed of Release and Reconveyance” was recorded at 12:58:13pm in the Maricopa County Recorders’ Office (NOT SIGNED) by unknown people & time, Document number 20060393093 has typed in date of “witnessed” of 03/23/2006. It shows the name of MERHL GIBSON Vice President of Principal Residential Mortgage, and Notary Jane Eyler of Fredrick County Maryland. (typed text only) As you see it was recorded the same day.
7. 3/16/2006 Scott M, signed a Deed of Trust which was then recorded on 03/23/2006 @ 3:19:03pm in Maricopa County Recorders Office. Document number 20060394390
“Borrower” Scott M
“Lender” Universal Savings Bank, F.A.
“Trustee” Stewart Title and Trust of Phoenix Inc. It also listed in section (E)
“MERS” is Mortgage Electronic Registration Systems, Inc. as a Separate Corporation, acting solely as “Nominee” for lender and lenders successors and assigns, also states that MERS is the “Beneficiary” under this Security Instrument.
8. Per a written response/email From Lehman Bros Holdings, a “loan at this address was owned by Lehman Brothers bank (LBB) and sold to Fannie Mae on 05/25/2006”( NO ASSIGNMENTS)
9. A Substitution of Trustee was signed on 07/22/2010 by Susan Smothers, Asst Sec MERS and recorded in Maricopa County Recorders office on the same day 7/22/2010 at 2:55:40pm Document number 2010062459
“Trustor” Scott M
“Undersigned Beneficiary” Mortgage electronic Registration systems, Inc. (MERS) as nominee for Universal Savings Bank, F.A
“Successor Trustee” Cal-Western Reconveyance Corporation
“ Trustee” Stewart Title & Trust of Phoenix, Inc. (There is NO PARCEL ID number shown on this document.)
10. Notice of Trustee’s Sale Under Deed of Trust (NOT’S) was signed AGAIN 07/22/2010 by Susan Smothers whom at this time was now A.V.P (Assistant Vice President) of Cal-Western Reconveyance Corporation and recorded in Maricopa County Recorders Office on 07/22/210 at 2:58:40pm
“Original Trustor” Scott M
“Current Trustee” Cal-Western Reconveyance Corporation
“Current Beneficiary” Aurora Loan Services LLC (YET NO ASSIGNMENTS HAVE PRIOR TO OR AFTER)
( LEGAL DESCRIPTION ATTACHED SEEMS TO BE TAKEN FROM ORG STRATFORD DOCS and is missing on recorded STRATFORD DEED with parcel id then typed in.
11. Purportedly On 12/14/2010 an Corporate Assignment Of Deed Of Trust was signed by Joshua Cook Loan Administration Assistant Vice President, for Aurora Loan Services, LLC, by IBM Lender Business Process Services, Inc., its Attorney in fact. For the value received to Fannie Mae. It was recorded in the MCRO on 08/04/2011 @ 10:58:44am. (We actually received this same document per a Qualified Written Request that IBM LPS was in violation of law in time it took to respond among other issues.) yet this actually didn’t show up anywhere until May 2011 HUH????????
12. Purportedly On 12/14/2010 an Corporate Assignment Of Deed Of Trust was again signed by Joshua Cook this time he was the notary to the signature of Charlene Busselaar with the title of MERS is Mortgage Electronic Registration Systems, Inc., as nominee for Universal Savings Bank, FA . For the value received to Aurora Loan Services LLC. “Effective Date of 0722/2010, “TYPED IN” the day they recorded the Notice of Trustee Sale and It also has stamped at the top First American Title, Instrument prepared by. (We actually received this same document per a Qualified Written Request that IBM LPS was in violation of law in time it took to respond.) yet this actually didn’t show up anywhere until May 2011 HUH????????
13. on 10/18/2010 we filed In the Maricopa County regarding the lawsuit and TRO/Injunction against (at the time) MERS, AURORA LOAN SERVICES LLC, CAL WESTERN RECONVEYANCE CORP. (As., We had no idea that Fannie Mae was involved in our loan at this time) added them much later
14. On 03/14/2012 Cal Western Reconveyance held the 2nd Auction date, which was never publicized, a new NOT’S was never made or given and the old NOT’S was never canceled nor amended. They used the EXACT SAME NOT’S from 07/22/2010 to continue and complete the illegal sale 2 years later.
15. A Trust Deed Upon Sale was signed on 03/16/2012 by the very same SUSAN SMOTHERS only this time she was AVP (Assistant Vice President) of Cal Western Reconveyance Corporation and they notary was a C. Hoy out of San Diego California and Recorded on 03/19/2012 in the MCRO. With an Effective date again typed in as 03/14/2012. The “Current Trustee” was named Cal Western Reconveyance Corporation, The “Original Trustor” was Scott M, The “Grantee” was Fannie Mae A/K/A Federal National Mortgage Association
16. We have never had a complete end to our cases nor full disclosure in around or during as well as after the “Fake” Auction we still to this day have not received the itemized close of loan/deed accounting or documents. AND YES they have been requested MULTIPLE times. But as you see, AZ Judicial System or Officials DON’T CARE about Broken Laws, Statues, Rules, Fraud, Fraud upon the Court, Illegal Conveyance, Forged, Fraudulent, Void and Invalid documents, robo signing, forged signatures of my husband, the list could go on and on. We go to our courts and our government for help in matters such as when the laws are meant to hold banks accountable for their fraudulent and illegal activity. AND THIS FRIENDS is JUST THE TIP of that hidden iceberg…….. Just saying….
Individuals are suppose to be positive, supportive, and comforting whether times are good or bad or even annoying to one or the other. Were suppose to see each other through the best of times and the worst of times. A healthy relationship with someone is reciprocal and balanced; it requires an equal amount of give and take, time and effort. Most times one or the other feels its one sided , We are suppose to be able to act as sounding boards for each other when we care for someone and all the issues bounce back and forth; Supportiveness leads to personal growth, not neediness. Supporting the ones you care about means giving them a hand up, not a hand out. The foundation for emotionally supportive relationships is communication. When you feel hesitant to communicate with others for fear that they may stop loving you or judge you for what you have to say, you inhibit the flow of exchange along the emotional bridge that you build. I have been an am still so hesitant to even type and send these words but I have faith that regardless of the out come, you care. One of you really does……I do too and I actually do things, as much as I can in different ways, at least I try my best thru it all to do so and continue to care, I am by no means a saint nor perfect or special, I am just me even if I don’t hear back, I know that sometimes, just saying nothing we realize may actually say more and something different than we ever expected. Trust me I have done it for years and it aint no picnic, but I know I have to continue to be who I am and that all I or anyone else in my life can and should be, is just their individual selves, and stand up and purse the right things more often then wrong ones in our short time, living.
Thank you for your time and actually reading this even if I don’t hear back.